How iPress on through De-Press-I-On (Depression)

Ever been in a situation were you feel like you're doing all you know to but "life" still isn't "working" out? I mean your trust God and put in the work(tithing,offerings,active in ministry, faithful) and STILL life keeps giving you that old Mike Tyson 1,2 punch? You bless others, encourage others, and you STILL lack. At this point you want to throw in the towel, cause after all, what's the point right? I mean wants the point of grinding every day if you STILL can't make ends meet? What's the point if you still are unhappy and alone? I mean why continue on? You have no money, fewer friends that support you, and you are alone, you've fasted, prayed, worked and still nothing so WHY GO ON RIGHT???? WRONG!!! You go on because at the end of the day, someone DOES love you, God! I know it doesn't always feel,seem, or look like it, but he does. When we are at our lowest, our brokest( yep made it up), our weakest, we must TRUST that God didn't...

I sometimes have moments that I feel the insecurities, doubts, etc creeping up withing me. My mind begins to replay all the bad things that have happened in my past, and even in my present. This starts me to start to doubt my future. Feeling that it will always be this way. No good thing will come my way. Blah blah Whaaa Whaaa. I have now learned that in THESE moments I rely on Gods truth for my life vs what the past replays or my eyes see. Whatever truth we decide to recite and/or replay is the truth we walk into Depression in some ways can be similar to being an addict. Until YOU decide that YOU are tired of being sick and tired of being depressed, you will continue to be depressed. It's is a daily fight of conscious decisions of healing that will make life a bit easier. We have to be conscious and intentional with our thoughts and feelings.  When negative feelings come we must recognize them and check those suckas at the door. The more we entertain them the more those thoughts s...

Last night was a tough night. Some memory triggers and life situations started to allow that ugly spirit of depression to come and knock on my door. I quickly made myself aware of what was happening and prayed to God that he would not allow the spirit to take over so I could sleep. He did just that. When I woke up, a variety of circumstance told everything in me to stay in bed, nothing will get better, life sucks now and always will. I literally got up, changed pajamas and got BACK in the bed. Who does that? I stayed in bed for a while until... Until I/ME/SHE/HER heard a small voice within say "NO!!! We WILL NOT allow this funky, no good for nothing spirit to control us". I got up(again), got dressed and went to the gym. Oh that first 10 minites was tough. I wasn't sure if I could complete the goal I set. I tried to stay focused and before I knew it, my workout was over and I rewarded myself with 10 minutes in the steamroom. I said all of that to say. Sometimes we have to...

So, first off I apologize for the missed days. OK... on to business. Those that suffer from depression know and understand that sometimes living while fighting depression can seem a bit like a roller coaster ride.  There are highs that are high and lows that are low.  There are unexpected twist and turn and big drops out of the blue.  Well, I am glad to say that at this moment I am riding high.  There were a few moments this week that I felt "The D" trying to roll up on me, but I was determined to PRESS past it.  When I wanted to cancel plans I didn't.  I kept all scheduled plans and you know what? I had a BLAST.  I had the opportunity this week to attend a big work event where I put on my genuine "happy face".  I met several clients that actually gave me a boost by telling me what a pleasure it's been working with me over the past NBA/ NHL season.  Next, it was time to celebrate my sister-girlfriends birthday(the same one I shared a post abo...

I am doing my entry for the day a little earlier than normal.  God did have me to start this site to heal myself and others, and I did know that it would require some… ok, ok  a great deal of transparency on my part, so here it goes.  On yesterday I just finished saying how I felt in a very good place right? How I felt better than I have in a long time.  After all I had a great weekend and everything.  Welp, wouldn't you know it that today I log on to FB only to discover that the last guy I dated, not really that long ago mind you, (wait for it) got MARRIED.  You heard me correctly, as I looked at the picture, I found myself holding back tears of pain. "Married?? How could he be married to someone else"? Of course at that moment all types of feelings started to come to my mind.  I quickly knew this WAS NOT a road that I wanted to go down so I hit one of my “break in case of emergency” buttons.  I hit up my lil bro and told him how I was feeling....

Do the best that you can with what you've got. It may be a little, may be a lot. Regardless of the measure, we are all blessed with SOMETHING. The key is not to worry about what someone else has. If we constantly measure ourselves to others we may feel that we always fall short. When really we only know what people allow us to know. For instance, you may see a woman that is beautiful, with a georgeous husband, big house, expensive car. That same woman may have tons of weave, makeup covering up bruises from being abused from her hunk of a man. The point, live out YOUR destiny not someone else's. Be tue to God, yourself and those that love you. Seek and use he gifts and talents God gave YOU! Follow YOUR dreams and reach YOUR goals! What are YOU working with? Work it!

Today, I took a major step in healing.  I owned my thoughts and perception.  When I started to realize that I was not in a good place (a happy place, slipping into depression) I started to step away from the people I usually hung around.  One friend in particular is seriously like a burst of sunshine, she always sees the positive and she is beautiful both inside and out.  I shut her out. I made excuses for not attending events, outings etc all because I didn't want to bring her, or anyone else, down with my issues.  Today, I came clean with her on why I have been so distant and shared with her some of my healing process.  I felt such a relief doing that. She didn't judge me, she built me up, told me how proud she was of me and how glad she was that I was "on my way back". She also shared with me that she loved me and is ALWAYS here for me and for me to always remember that.  See, in my mind I had my own idea of how she would have perceived me, judged m...