Lesson Learned

I am doing my entry for the day a little earlier than normal.  God did have me to start this site to heal myself and others, and I did know that it would require some… ok, ok  a great deal of transparency on my part, so here it goes.  On yesterday I just finished saying how I felt in a very good place right? How I felt better than I have in a long time.  After all I had a great weekend and everything.  Welp, wouldn't you know it that today I log on to FB only to discover that the last guy I dated, not really that long ago mind you, (wait for it) got MARRIED.  You heard me correctly, as I looked at the picture, I found myself holding back tears of pain. "Married?? How could he be married to someone else"? Of course at that moment all types of feelings started to come to my mind.  I quickly knew this WAS NOT a road that I wanted to go down so I hit one of my “break in case of emergency” buttons.  I hit up my lil bro and told him how I was feeling.  He personally never liked the guy anyway. Always felt something wasn’t right about him. He told me that he doesn’t like that my heart is hurting, but instead of being sad about this situation, I should be rejoicing that I dodged that bullet. I knew that he was right, why cry over someone that obviously didn’t have my heart in mind?  In that moment I realized the reason that I stopped dating him in the first place.  I KNOW I’m a great woman and I KNOW that God has a great man out there for me that will treat me the way that God intended a man to treat his wife.  Why am I sharing this with you? I’m sharing it because I know that loneliness can be a trigger of depression for many people and it’s OK to want to be in a relationship but we must ask ourselves if we want to be in ANY type of relationship, or the RIGHT relationship.  I don’t know about you, but I have had my share of bad marriages, relationships, etc and I am DONE with that part of my life.  But to be done, I/me/he/she has to make some changes.  When dealing with this guy, I KNEW he really wasn’t what I wanted in a mate, but still I held on longer than I know I should have because something is better than nothing right? WRONG!  Once I got to the point to let him go, of course feelings came into play. But now seeing that he obviously was seeing someone else at the same time lets me know that I passed THAT test and that lesson has been learned.  On to the next course, I’m wiser now.

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